Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Helping is NOT always good!

Hello there,

If you're like me you want to help every way you can.  Being a part of Together We Can Change The World would indicate you have a giving heart.  That's great!  Unless... GIVING would actually do more harm than good.  Huh?  Let me share a story with you that was written by one of our Someone Believes In You authors, Suess Karlsson.

"What is this? I can't tell." Curious, and getting down on his knees on the sidewalk, Lane got a better look at it. His normal evening walk sometimes rewarded him with treasures from nature. He enjoyed his discoveries and always regarded his finds with great respect.

But what had he found? Recognizing it as an emperor moth's cocoon, Lane decided to keep it. He gently scooped the cocoon into his chest pocket and meandered home. Placing the cocoon into a clear container, Lane felt a small excitement travel through him. He surprised himself by anticipating being a witness to the moth's emergence from its cocoon.

A few days passed. Finally, a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the moth for several hours as the moth struggled to force its body through a tiny, tiny hole.

Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as the majestic moth was stuck.

Lane could watch no more. In kindness, he decided to help the moth.

With a small pair of scissors, he snipped off a bit of the cocoon and freed his emperor moth. Now the moth emerged easily. But something was wrong . . . very wrong. It had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings. Lane continued to watch the moth because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand. He expected the moth to be able to support the body which would contract in time. Neither happened!

In fact, the little moth spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It was never able to fly.

Unfortunately, Lane realized too late that the restricting cocoon and the moth's struggle for freedom was a requirement for survival. The moth needed to struggle through the tiny opening. It was nature's way of forcing fluid from the body of the moth into its wings so that it would be ready for flight. Its freedom and flight would only come after the struggle.

By depriving the moth of a struggle, he deprived the moth of health.

Wow! Come to think of it -- sometimes the same is true for humans.

The struggles in our lives give us strength. If we were to go through our life without any obstacles, we would be crippled. It is never easy to struggle and it is certainly never easy to watch someone else with their struggles. But think about it, if we never let children struggle with learning to walk, we would all be carrying around some mighty big kids! What if we never made any mistakes? Would we learn anything? If everything in life worked out the first time, how many inventions would have been missed?

Lane believed he was doing the right thing. And he is not at fault. We are all like that. We just want to help and make it better. I do that too. With my kids, my friends, even with myself... but sometimes I know I need to wait and let the struggle run its course... Let the fight create the strength. Out of love, I must allow nature to do its work.

I know it is not easy but I believe the outcome is worth the wait. I believe in my kids and friends and family... yeah, I believe in myself enough, that I will allow the obstacles to stand. I won't give up trying though, and I'll never quit encouraging others around me.

Will you do the same? Let's both learn from Lane and let life teach us. We will be strong and able if we can do that. Let's give every obstacle an opportunity to become our strength.


I so love this story because it holds so much powerful truth.  I think the biggest challenge is having the wisdom to know when people need help, and when they need to struggle to find their strength.  I would love to hear any stories you may have about times when you needed that struggle, or when you knew someone else needed that struggle - and what the results were.  Nothing is more powerful than people's stories... I would love to know yours!

If you, or someone you love, is in the midst of a struggle now - take heart from the lesson of the Emperor Moth.

Have a wonderful day!

Ginny Dye